Hung

I have an enormous headache. I have had it all day. I was out drinking last night. I got home at 4 am and didn't sleep much. The ticcing just makes the headache worse. Lately, one of my most abused tics is unfocusing my eyes. It's not exactly a cure for headaches.
This is the thing with drinking for me. When I have a few drinks my tics get much worse. And then as I get more and more drunk, they disappear completely. I have read about other touretters saying the opposite. They say their tics get worse when they drink. Maybe, they never get fall on their faces drunk. That's the problem. You need to get the demon so drunk it passes out before you do. I used to drink a lot. I had a serious drinking problem. And this was a direct result of my ticcing. The heavy drinking just made it go away, temporarily. The problem was I didn't always remember those blissful, tic-free evenings.
I have also read that smoking pot makes tics go away for some people. This is not true at all in my case. The exact opposite happens. My tics get way worse. That is the reason why I stopped smoking the stuff many years ago. I do still drink, though.
And although while I am drunk my tics recede, the next day I usually pay heavily for it. They get much worse. My ticcing is riding on a pendulum. Never stops. Back and forth. Push and pull. I quit drinking for 5 years, once. It didn't make a difference in the long run when it came to my TS. I still ticced. It still waxed and waned.
I do wonder about my drinking and drugging when I was younger. I started drinking and smoking pot heavily when I was a teenager. I read somewhere that this can make conditions like TS and OCD worse. Or at least accelerate them into a more mature state. I wonder, had I not drank and smoked so much in high school, would my TS be as bad as it is now. I had relatively bad TS when I was a child. Then it got a lot better when I was in high school. It wasn't until I was about 18 or 19 that it regressed back to the way it once was. Maybe it was the forced production of dopamine. Maybe I messed myself up more than I needed to.
I guess it doesn't really matter. I am here now. And this is the life I must deal with, however it came to be.
So, cheers, L'chaim. Drink up...